Words on Clothes

 Two of my least-favored attributes are that I am sometimes extremely dense, and I am always a very slow reader. Another one is that very often I'll have to read something (even simple somethings) several times before I understand what that something says. I often will read the same paragraph in a book, for instance, having read it once and realized that I have no clue what I just read.

This combination of attributes is a bit irritating at times, and sometimes I feel as though they get me into real trouble.

To wit: I was at a party once, and I noticed a tee shirt that had a word on it that I was not familiar with. So I read it, and not understanding, read it again. And again (assuming that I must have missed a letter, since this word was not known to me; nope: I had seen all the letters). I thought it might be a town's name, perhaps. Maybe it was the manufacturer of the shirt, like how “Gap” and “Levi's” ends up on clothing. My mind kind of got into it's dense little holding pattern, trying to figure out options that it might be. I don't know how long I stared at this teenaged girl's chest, but it was really too long.

Finally I looked at her, and asked what the word was, and she told me that it was the name of a store where they sold the shirt. That didn't really help me to stop feeling like a lascivious old pedophile though.

So I'm thinking that there should be a rule against young ladies having any sort of graphics or words on their clothing. Especially shirts, upon which manufacturers put the words too high and get us guys into trouble. I would also think that these ladies would feel a bit uncomfortable, no? The old “why are you staring at me like that, you old pervert” sense?

And what's a guy to do, really? The option that occurs to me is to address the lady and ask something like: “Excuse me, I am interested in what your shirt says, but I don't want to seem like I'm staring at your breasts, so could you please take your shirt off so that I can read it?”

How much trouble would I get into for that? Even more for words on pants, eh?

Save a guy: ban words and images from girls' clothes!